I recently had a virtual interview for a job I really want. As I prepared for it, I found myself becoming unexpectedly self-conscious about the tattoo on my hand. I started to panic thinking about how to cover it, what makeup might work, how I should hold my hand during the interview, all of it.

Ironically, when I signed into the interview, the hiring manager appeared on screen with tattoos on her neck, chest, and hand. My immediate thought was, Oh… so I didn’t need to cover mine after all. I didn’t view her as unprofessional in any way. If anything, I was surprised by my own reaction and it made me pause and reflect on my personal journey with self-acceptance.

When I first got my hand tattoo, my daughter asked, “What about work?” My response at the time was simple: I work remotely, so it won’t matter. And at that moment, it didn’t. What I hadn’t considered was that later I might want to change positions, change careers, and interview again. I didn’t think that far ahead and honestly, I had always been okay with my tattoo. Of course, I had the normal back-and-forth thoughts: Should I have gotten it? Should it have been smaller? Did I make the right choice? But nothing that truly shook me.

Yet this interview brought up more than just concern about my tattoo. I found myself worrying about my appearance overall and feeling the pressure to perform something I’ve consciously been trying to move away from. I no longer want to perform; I want to show up as myself.

During the interview, both interviewers were very stoic calm, serious, and direct just question after question. I answered as best as I could, though I wasn’t entirely sure if what I was saying was “right” or what they were looking for. When the interview ended, I didn’t feel anxious or upset. I felt… reflective.

I had spent so much energy worrying about covering my tattoos, only to be met by someone who wore hers boldly and unapologetically. That moment reminded me that sometimes we need to accept the choices we’ve made fully and confidently. Not just outwardly, but internally.

It’s not about what you have on or what you wear. It’s about who you are. It’s about your character, your capability, and how you treat people. Some of the kindest, most compassionate, and least judgmental people I’ve ever met have been covered in tattoos. And some people without any tattoos at all… well, you know how that can go.

I share this because I’ve realized there’s still work for me to do around self-acceptance and self-identity. And I think many of us have parts of ourselves we’re still learning to accept not for the sake of others, but for our own peace. So that we can show up boldly, proudly, and authentically as ourselves.

Yes, people will judge. But it’s not what’s on the outside that truly matters it’s what’s on the inside.